Weekend Chatter

Happy Sunday Everyone!

I type this post while watching the second quarter of the Cowboys-Giants game (DVR’ing Breaking Bad– decisions, decisions). I love watching a good football game, especially when it’s not a Jets game. My poor husband, a lifelong Jets fan, suffers season after season watching the Jets. Sometimes there’s cursing and yelling involved. Even though the Jets won today, we know better than to get our hopes up. Anyway, football is so much more fun when your team isn’t playing.

Ouch! Romo just went down and is being helped off the field, meanwhile, the camera shows the Cowboys owner, Jerry Jones, sitting next to New Jersey’s very own Chris Christie. New Jersey is everywhere, people! But I digress . . .

This weekend, a few fun things happened (besides our first NFL Sunday and a Jets win). Fun Thing Number One is that yesterday an idea I submitted to The Daily Post for a Daily Prompt was used! The prompt was to name a luxury you can’t live without.  You can see the post here. I was thinking about my cleaning lady when I came up with the idea. I also thought about Spaceballs when Princess Vespa whips out her hair dryer and says, “It’s my Industrial Strength Hair Dryer, and I CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT IT!” In response to the Prompt people wrote lovely thoughts. Some luxuries mentioned were coffee, the internet, families, and look at these desserts from Barcelona that my Blog Sister, the Public Transit User, featured. Wowzers.

Unfortunately, I didn’t get a chance to post on the prompt because Fun Thing Number Two happened . . . I went to a PAR-TAY– an outdoor all-out bash at a barn on a country club.  The Birthday Barn Party featured country music (ugh), smoked meats, and a mechanical bull. I borrowed boots and a hat from my mom, was schooled in the rules of bull riding by my father (something about having to hang on for 8 seconds), and kissed the kids and husband goodbye. The best part of party night was that my husband insisted I couldn’t drive my disgusting, beat up minivan to a country club to be valet parked, so I drove our “fancy” car– a Hyundai Sonata.  Okay, I can hear your giggles. But it IS a top of the line Sonata, so there! Here are some pics:

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My foot driving the “fancy car” in a cowboy boot!
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My stuff for the party- a cowboy hat, a gift bag containing a bottle of champagne, my purse (mostly to carry my lipstick), and flats for when my boots started to annoy me.
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Driving the Hyundai! I plugged in my phone and shuffled and look what came on!? Another poser country girl! (Just kidding, Taylor. I love you.)

I have to admit that I didn’t ride the bull and left before the cake, but seeing my friend celebrate her birthday and tripping down memory lane made for a lovely night.

This morning I partook in Fun Thing Number Three. Yoga. But during this yoga class, Stretchy Woman (my beloved teacher) decided we would do yoga up against the wall.  “Wall Yoga,” she called it.  Practicing in this way is quite enlightening in that you feel your alignment and different angles of your body when certain parts of it are pressed against the flat wall, and you get to do fun things like hold yourself upside down and walk your legs up the wall and really feel your shoulders and arms working to hold you up. It was interesting to try.

Then during the afternoon I accomplished a Not-So-Fun-Thing. The Great Toy Purge Project of 2013. I braved the basement mess of ten years of toys and I sorted and separated and packed and bagged old toys. The project took hours and resulted in five large black garbage bags, a ton of things to donate, and peace of mind. However, it’s still a mess down there. I have a couple of random piles that I’m not sure how to deal with. I took some pics for you though (the fun never ends here at WOAW!):

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Garbage bags. Getting rid of the train table. Thank God for Hefty!
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Haven’t tackled the books yet. Help!
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Packed like items into gallon ziplock bags to donate.
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And still have to figure out the stuffed animals . . .

That’s what I did this weekend, and here it is late Sunday night and tomorrow is another Monday. I’m hoping tomorrow will be my Magnificent Made-Up Men of Monday inaugural post (featuring Lloyd Dobler, as promised). I’ll try.

Have a nice night!

Being Better

Tonight I’m wishing I was better.

I’ve been in a rut the past few weeks and I can’t exactly figure out why. But I do know this. I wish I was better. At everything.

I wish I could be a better mother. I wish I was a better employee. I wish I could be a better wife, daughter, sister, friend, neighbor, driver, cook, Catholic, shopper, organizer, blogger, planner, traveler.

I wish I was a better writer. Even just writing these sentences I’m wondering if I should be using “were” instead of “was.” (I wish I were a better writer, or I wish I was a better writer? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?) I don’t even know. Isn’t that terrible?

I know I’m not bad at all that stuff. Some days I’m good at it and some days I’m less good. I’m not fishing for compliments here. I’m just thinking “out loud.”

Some days I’m satisfied with all the “me’s” I listed above and I feel like I’m enough. Other days I’m not as satisfied, that’s all. Tonight’s one of those nights where I just wish I could do everything better. I guess the “rut” part comes from knowing that wishing to be better doesn’t make it happen– there has to be some action involved. But action takes motivation. I think that at this moment, I’m not motivated to be better. Because I’m in a rut. See the vicious circle there?

I don’t know. Maybe it all comes down to “motivation.” I’m going to google “How does one get motivated” when I finish pounding out this post. Scratch that. I’ll google it now. Be right back . . .

. . . I’m back.  Here’s a link to a Wikihow page on How to Get Motivated. Be happy, energetic, efficient, get support, feel fulfilled. Meh. Maybe I’m barking up the wrong tree with the “motivation” angle.

Do we all have ruts like this, when we don’t feel like we’re enough? When we aren’t living up to our potential and aren’t pushing ourselves even an inch further towards awesome? Sulky, blah days of feeling inadequate?

Now that I’m examining this, do you think it’s a coincidence that my “rut” is happening at the same time that (a) I haven’t been to yoga in weeks; (b) I stopped taking my vitamins; and/or (c) I fell off the wagon and started up my Diet Coke addiction again?  (it may sound dumb but I really think being on the Coke alters my moods). Also, with the puppy and a recent neck injury I haven’t been sleeping as well as I was a month ago. I haven’t read any good books to inspire me. The only movie I’ve been to this summer is Monsters U. and I spent most of the movie wrangling M. into behaving.

Hmm, methinks I’m onto something here! Starting tomorrow I’m going to fix the stuff listed in the above paragraph and see if that helps. I almost sound motivated there, right?

Thanks, Blogtropolis! Another reason blogging is so great- it provides a forum to write it out, and sometimes writing it out = figuring it out.

Have a nice night.

100th Post!

After starting this blog with a sprint from the starting line on January 3, 2013, I now crawl over the 100 post milestone, almost six months later.

So what have I learned from blogging?

Well, I’ve read that most blogs die around six months. I’ve definitely slowed down, but I’m not dead by far. I think I’m suffering from spring fever. I’ve heard from more experienced bloggers that things on WordPress slow down over the summer, so I’m just going to accept that and not be too hard on myself.

I’ve also learned that all the fear I felt in the beginning of my journey here was for nothing. You’ve all been generous and kind. Nobody has begged me to stop posting and find another hobby! Your kindness has helped my writing on and off this blog. In fact, I think that starting this blog is probably the best thing I did for my writing. It has forced me to create and think and write and edit and read, and most importantly, to share. I mentioned in a previous post that I sent a project to an editor. I am certain that had I not gained some confidence from posting here, I wouldn’t have had the guts to do that.

At yoga tonight, my teacher explained that certain poses are for “information.” They show us how far we’ve come, where we want to be, and force us to listen to our bodies. For example, if our twist isn’t as open and reaching as we’d like, we use that as information to determine whether our shoulder strength is the problem, or perhaps our lower back, or maybe we just aren’t as flexible as we’d like to be. The best part about yoga is that it doesn’t matter. We breathe and we do our best and we use information that we gain from our practice to better ourselves. We’re taught to reject the ego that compares and criticizes, and accept that we are perfect in our imperfection.

So far on my blogging adventure, I’d like to think that I’ve rejected the ego and learned along the way. I do my best and try to get better, but it doesn’t really matter if I screw up or miss a typo or bore you to death one or two nights with posts that I think are fabulous. The reality is that I enjoy posting, and I breathe through it, learn, and keep going. Like my yoga practice, to me this blog is perfect in all of its imperfection. I really love doing it and it’s important to me.

On this special 100th post night, which also falls on the Eve of Summer 2013 (and Game 7 of the NBA Finals), I would like to thank you for sticking around and taking the journey with me.  I look forward to writing the next 100 posts!

P.S. I’ve started a WOAW Twitter account. I’ve been a twitter voyeur for years, but not an active tweeter. I’m going to try though. Follow me at @jessWOAW and I’ll follow you back and we’ll take over the Twitterverse (Twitter-tropolis?)!

Have a nice night!

Hola! Odds and Ends

Hello Blogtropolis! It has been over a week since my last post and I miss you!  Just some quick odds and ends tonight to keep in touch.

Here’s a Top Ten of what’s on my mind:

1. Work. Work = Blah, Blech, Yuck, Yada Yada. Work really does interfere with life, doesn’t it? Enough said.

2. Writing. Angela and I are busy meeting a deadline for submitting a screenplay to a film festival (sounds fancy, I know). Edits, rewrites, etc. need to be completed by Friday. She has done a lot of work on the project and now I’m up to the plate, hoping not to strike out! I’m also super jealous that she’s enjoying Cali for a few days and I am stuck at work (see # 1, above) in Trenton. We compared our outdoor views today via text pics and I’ll let you guess who had the better view. I’m also working on a rewrite of one of my own projects.

3. I am going to be “sick” tomorrow (see #1) and spending the day at The Philadelphia Zoo with sixty third graders in 92 degree heat. I had hoped to sign the permission slip for this trip and kiss the kid goodbye on zoo day with his disposable lunch and some money for the gift shop, but he looked at me with those big brown eyes and asked me to chaperone “like the other moms,” so how could I say no? I anticipate a headache and a sunburn tomorrow night.

4. Special thanks to my friend Lauren for introducing me to Gossip Girl. By “thank you” I actually mean “thanks a lot for spearheading a crack-like addiction.” I am sucked into the drama in the middle of Season One and obsessed with Serena van der Woodsen  (Blake Lively) with her beautiful hair and complicated love life, and the grungy Brooklyn art gallery dad Rufus (Matthew Settle) who is like the coolest dad ever, and the almost-too-pretty-to-look-at Chace Crawford. Being in the middle of not one, but two writing projects is not conducive to a growing Gossip Girl addiction. Damn you Netflix, for being so awesome! Lauren and Netflix did this to me once before with Friday Night Lights and I ended up watching five seasons in about three months (“Texas Forever”) and fell in love with Taylor Kitsch. Now it’s starting again. While I’m on the topic, ready fans?  Tim Riggins vs. Nate Archibald.  GO!

Tim Riggins (Taylor Kitsch)
Nate Archibald (Chace Crawford)

5. Father Handsome. Speaking of crushes, my mother and I have an inappropriate crush on a priest who she has deemed “Father Handsome.” Father Handsome said mass Sunday which prompted me to spend $1.99 to download The Thorn Birds by Colleen McCullough onto my Kindle. I remember watching the miniseries on television in 1983 and I think I’ve read the book before but I’m going to read it again now as an adult. Any fans?

6. Tornadoes suck. Thoughts and prayers to those in Oklahoma. I can’t believe the pictures and news I’m reading. Is there anything that can be done to prevent disasters like these? Mother Nature can’t be tamed or brought to justice. We are all at Her mercy.

7. NBA Playoffs. The Knicks are out but the Pacers-Heat matchup is turning into an interesting series (tied at 2-2). Does anyone else find sports way more enjoyable when you don’t really care who wins? It’s so stress-free.  A totally different experience. It’s also quieter since my husband isn’t cursing at the television.

8. I found out that Chaturanga Man, (you remember my yoga instructor, yes?) is a pharmacist. This discovery weirded me out a bit. Does it make sense? On Sunday he wore a shirt that displayed three words. The first two words were “Karma” and “Dharma,” but the third word was hidden, bunched around his waist area. I would have died if it said “Pharma,” but it didn’t. It said “Zen.” I would look for a pic of the shirt and post it but I don’t want WordPress to have a freak out and shut me down.

9. Is anybody following this Mexico Mom Drug Bust story? This devout Mormon woman (a mom of seven) goes to Mexico for a funeral and gets on the bus to come home and the bus gets stopped by Mexican authorities who find twelve pounds of marijuana under her seat. She claims she was set up and surmises that the authorities wanted to bribe her. In fact, according to the news report the authorities told the woman and her husband that $5000 would secure her freedom, but when the husband scrapped together the money the woman was not released– they claimed she’d been transferred to another jail. I think I believe her story. Am I nuts?

10. Apologies for my WordPress absence. I haven’t posted or read my followed blogs recently but as soon as I get these projects moving, I’ll be back! Be on the lookout for my next post which I think is going to be about The Love Boat. Yep, that Love Boat.

Have a nice night!

(Pics:  Taylor, http://www.ourbestbites.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/tim-riggins.jpg; Chace, http://amumag.com/images/2013/02/Chace-Crawford-photo.jpg )

Yoga Adventures: My Yoga Crush and The Return of The Giggle Girl

A little backstory before I get to this week’s Yoga Adventures. One recent Friday I was off of work and decided to take a weekday yoga class. Ah! What a luxury! I knew there would be less people– maybe some stay-at-home parents and some retirees– which would mean space. Space that extended a foot or two on either side of my mat (weekend and night classes with my beloved Chaturanga Man and the lovely Stretchy Woman are always packed). I didn’t know the teacher for this weekday luxury class. Oh well, I thought. It’s probably nice to try out a new teacher.

New teacher breezed in exactly at the moment class was to start and looked like she just stepped off of the cover of Yoga Journal, my new favorite magazine. She had a cute, short haircut, and a great yoga outfit, and a yoga body with sculpted shoulders and arms. She was adorable and perfect– the Yoga Covergirl. If you saw her on the street you’d probably guess she was a yoga instructor.

Covergirl’s teaching style was new to me. She spoke during the entire hour in a soft, melodic voice telling us to follow our breath and she didn’t stop moving. She sort of did her own practice and we were invited to follow along to the extent we could. Basically, it was C-Man on steroids. Which was fine. I wasn’t totally sold on it, but whatever. It was a class and I was grateful to attend.

Anyhoo, fast forward to Stretchy Woman’s Thursday night class. The class was light on attendance, maybe because of spring breaks. Also, I think the majority of New Year’s Resolutioners are over it now and back to their old unhealthy ways. Yay! Parking spots abound!

I put my mat down and started to stretch when the door flings open and guess who walks in. You know who. The Giggle Girl.

I posted about The Giggle Girl here and told you what a distraction she was during class, however, since that post on March 11, I hadn’t seen her– until Thursday night when she parked herself front and center face to face with Stretchy, and dropped her water bottle and a stack of tissues next to her. Wonderful, I thought.

Then I remembered that the night before I had preached tolerance to all of you, and silently chastised myself for being a hypocrit. Tolerance for The Giggle Girl, I reminded myself.

Stretchy Woman starts class by asking if anyone has any requests for body parts to work on. The usual responses are things people want worked on, like “neck,” “balance,” “core.” Well last night, Giggle’s request was something she didn’t want to work on: “No thighs” she requested, followed by a fit of giggles.

No thighs? It’s a yoga class, and basically any standing pose is going to work the thighs, no? I’m no expert, but if Stretchy Woman could have figured out a way to avoid working the thighs, I’d be impressed. Then, The Giggle Girl said she wanted to “do the wall” again, which meant she wanted to do final resting pose up against the wall. You may recall that last time I attended class with her, this modification for final resting pose caused a hysterical outburst. Tolerance for The Giggle Girl…. Tolerance for The Giggle Girl, I told myself. As we shut our eyes and “came to our breath,” it became my mantra. On the inhale: “Tolerance,” on the exhale “for The Giggle Girl,” inhale: “Tolerance,” exhale: “For The Giggle Girl.” You get my drift.

I settled down and began to breathe and re-focus and all that fun stuff, when who walks in and unrolls her mat next to me? The Yoga Covergirl. So of course now I am entirely unfocused and totally could not “come to my mat.” Sitting between an instructor and The Giggle Girl, I was toast. And we hadn’t even started yet.

When I returned home after class I told my husband about the Return of The Giggle Girl and listed the things that had caused her sillies during class: Alternate nostril breathing caused laughter and then a series of snorts and tissue use, followed by trips across the floor to the garbage can; cow face pose almost had her in tears. Here’s a pic of cow face pose:

Cow Face Pose (That’s not The Giggle Girl) Courtesy of Yoga Journal (http://www.yogajournal.com/media/originals/BASICS_206_Gomukhasana_248.jpg)

Then I told him about Yoga Covergirl and how her down dog was so perfect and how nice her biceps were and about her cute yoga top and he asked me if I was in love with her. I think I may be. I did watch her the entire class (besides some evil eye glances towards The Giggle Girl), wishing I could have short hair and not look like a boy, and tried to mimic her lovely gate pose:

In case it’s unclear, that’s not Yoga Covergirl Courtesy of Yoga Journal (http://www.yogajournal.com/media/originals/BASICS_AM06_01.jpg)

Definitely not focused on my practice during this class. I think that in yoga, and also in life (one of my new favorite phrases) it is so difficult to tune out of “all that” and into “what matters.” Why is that? In yoga, I wonder if a class without mirrors would help. Anyone ever try a yoga class without mirrors, if that exists? I think in life, the equivalent of yoga without mirrors is to look inward, instead of at the images and scenarios scattered all around us trying to distract us from what matters.

I am going to make my main goal for Sunday yoga to stay focused. Hopefully my new Yoga Crush and The Giggle Girl will be no-shows!

Have a nice weekend!

Giggle Girl

As you all know, I try to attend yoga class twice a week. My yoga classes are held at a gym– a regular gym with rows of treadmills and ellipticals, a basketball and racquetball court, and even a “Cardio Cinema” (Basically, it’s a movie theater that substitutes cardio machines for seats. Ingenious.).

The good thing about taking yoga at the regular gym is that I pay twenty dollars a month and attend eight yoga classes, which comes to $2.50/class. Of course too, I am free to use any of the aforementioned services offered by the gym, including the babysitting room. If I make it to yoga class early, I can set up my mat then go out into the gym for a short run on the treadmill. If I wanted to, I could check out a flick in the Cardio Cinema after yoga class. Options, options, options. I am sure you can see that financially this is a good deal.

Recently, the thought crossed my mind that if I wanted to get more serious about yoga, eventually I may want to quit the gym and attend a yoga studio instead. While the gym offers plenty of workout options, a yoga studio would allow me to try out different types of yoga classes.  I’d pay for this variety though.  Also, I doubt that yoga studios offer babysitting.

Still, I sometimes wonder if I would get more out of the experience at a studio dedicated to yoga. Where everyone who walks in has the same desire and purpose and love. Because some days I walk into class, and “come to my mat” and find it difficult to stay there, so to speak.

I can handle the times we meditate and Rihanna pounds through the walls from the gym floor. I tolerate flinching during savasana (corpse pose) at the loud banging noise when someone uses the paper towel dispenser located on the other side of the wall. I can even keep my cool when the booming, amplified voice of the cycle instructor overpowers the soft chants of our yoga music during balance poses. But, there’s one thing I am finding hard to handle. One thing that may send me running to the private yoga studio.

Enter the Giggle Girl.

Giggle Girl is a pleasantly plump, twenty-something, who loves to show up late to class and set up her mat in the front of the room. I don’t know if she’s nervous, or anxious, or either over or under confident, but she’s constantly drawing attention to herself. As a mom, I often find myself wanting to tell her to “settle down.” She’s jittery and noisy, albeit in a happy way.

I’m going to allow myself to sound like a snob for a second, so bear with me. When I come to yoga, I really want the hour to be about me and my practice and my mat. I don’t want to notice the people around me. We are always told not to compare ourselves to others. To be inside ourselves. To spend the hour focused on our own breathing and our own bodies. To be “present on our mat.”

Giggle Girl manages to uproot the whole idea of inner peace and focus.

Remember when you were a kid, and you’d have to stand on one foot? Maybe you joined your friends in a balance contest, and you’d lift your foot until you felt yourself start to tip, and then you’d do something goofy, like wave your arms in circles and say, “WHHOOOAAAA,” as you dramatically fall to the floor. This is what Giggle Girl does when she can’t hold a pose.

Or, there’s the time we switched it up and did savasana with our back on the floor, our butts up to the wall, and our legs up along the wall, making a ninety-degree angle with our bodies. This set Giggle Girl into a fit of sillies that lasted through our entire final relaxation.  She couldn’t get her butt all the way to the wall, and then she just felt weird, I guess. Her barely stifled giggles were a nice background track to the LMFAO song playing in the gym outside the wall. I spent all of savasana wondering if Giggle Girl thought she was Sexy and If She Knew It.

Sometimes, when things get too tough for Giggle Girl, she simply sits on her mat and watches us while drinking her water. Always smiling and giggly. Or she over-dramatically sighs. Or goofily says something like “yeah right!” when we are supposed to twist in a way that seems humanly impossible.

We all find the practice challenging, but we try to keep it together and act like adults. We ignore each other’s physical presence, try not to disturb others, and attempt to benefit from the positive energy in the room. When Giggle Girl is around though, we all end up focusing on her.

Drives me bonkers.

I know it is partially wrong of me to feel like this. First, I realize it’s a gym, and a bunch of people are in yoga class simply because it is what is being offered on that day at that time. I’m under no illusion that everyone in the classroom is looking to learn in the same way that I am.

I recognize that Giggle Girl’s ability to distract me is more of a flaw in myself than in her. She may be self-absorbed, but part of yoga is learning to focus, and obviously, I am not mastering that in her presence.

Also, I don’t know if Giggle Girl’s actions are executed of her own free will. I have a special needs child who does things like this all the time, and I hope and expect people to tolerate his actions. Perhaps Giggle Girl is socially-awkward herself, and I should be more understanding. Me, of all people, shouldn’t judge someone else’s behavior.

Then, I ponder if the real problem isn’t Giggle Girl, but rather the yoga instructors. Shouldn’t they have a nice chat with Giggle Girl and ask her to calm down? In their defense, sometimes they try to “offer up” a different pose to all of us if we can’t handle a more challenging pose, and I think their offer is aimed at Giggles.  The approach they prefer towards Giggles seems to be one of tolerance.

I know I’m not paying a lot for my classes and I get what I pay for, but it is rather annoying. I’ve thought about making a comment to Giggles myself, or “shushing” her, but I never do.

Maybe I am too nice. Or maybe I’m a snob. I don’t know. Either way, I wish people could step outside of themselves and see the effect they have on others. Whether you must deal with Giggles disrupting your yoga practice, or a restaurant patron complaining about your kid’s behavior, or finding out somebody spread gossip about you, people like Giggles exist in all of our lives, in many different scenarios a lot more serious than yoga class. They are the people who are insensitive to others, who speak without a filter, who don’t think before they act on a whim, or who have no self-control.  They are the people who don’t realize that words or actions may affect others.

My friend Megan loves to use the quote from Seinfeld: “People. They’re the worst.” She (and Jerry) are right. They are the worst. At least, they can be. Sometimes people are annoying, and rude, and ignorant. Sometimes they walk across the intersection on the red light instead of the green when you are trying to drive, and sometimes they cut on line at the grocery store when you walk two feet away to pick up a People Magazine. But I try to tolerate and understand, and yes, maybe, I’m nice to a flaw. Maybe it’s because I have a special needs son, and I am nervous that someday his innocence will be mistaken for rudeness and I won’t be there to protect him.

Being “tolerant” and “nice” may not be the most self-serving way to go through life. It means that you take a hit once in awhile. You put up with Giggle Girl and lose out on a peaceful relaxation pose. You let the person cross the street and thank God you didn’t hit them as your blood pressure spikes. You let the shopper cut the line and watch your ice cream melt. Maybe you choose to stay quiet instead of argue with someone and don’t get your point across.  Why?  Because: (a) if you give someone the benefit of the doubt, maybe the Universe will return the favor someday; (b) you don’t want to spend your life in a constant state of stress and anger; (c) it just doesn’t matter in the long run; and/or (d) because People. They’re the worst. And sometimes they can’t help it.

So that’s it. It seems through writing this post that I’ve made my decision to continue to put up with Giggle Girl.  Maybe someday if Giggle Girl and I become friends, I can talk to her kindly about her yoga etiquette. Maybe even if we don’t become friends, I can talk to her about it. Until that day when I’m not just teetering on the brink of insanity but am actually knee-deep into Crazy because of her behavior, I’ll tolerate the sighs and the giggles and the obnoxious “whoooaaas” as she falls out of her poses. Because maybe she can’t help it– and at least she’s not mean.

Thanks for reading along with my vent about Giggle Girl.  Have a nice night. 🙂

Back into the Groove . . .

Tonight I attempt to get back into the blogging groove with a short, simple post.  Thanks for coming back.

I’m immersed again in my yoga book:  The Heart of Yoga: Developing a Personal Practice, by T.K.V. Desikachar, and wanted to share.  Here’s a verse I found in the “Yoganjalisaram” section:

Respect parents, avoid evil,

seek always the company of good,

and worship the Lord with faith.

In other words, hang with good people, respect your elders, don’t get sucked into evil, and believe in something bigger than this world.

How about this verse:

Rid your body of impurities,

let your speech be true and sweet,

feel friendship for the world, and

with humility seek wealth and knowledge.

Be healthy, honest, caring, and attempt to be smart and successful but don’t be a jerk while you’re doing it.

These verses come from a manuscript written by T. Krishnamacharya, who lived to be one-hundred years old, and believed that yoga covered every aspect of human life– that it could resolve physical, mental and spiritual problems.

Life can be difficult and challenging.  We get caught up in craziness and we struggle– with people, with ourselves.  Why is it so hard to live a simple life– a life that is as simple as these verses?  Why are we often stressed out and nervous and anxious?  Can peace be attained only by disposing of our possessions, moving to India, and spending our days meditating on a mountain?  I don’t think so. I hope not.

I trust that people can lead a fulfilling life wherever they live and whatever they do.  Where we are, what we own, whether or not we work, or have kids, or have money, doesn’t really matter.  Happiness is internal.  We aren’t going to achieve true happiness and peacefulness from anything we can buy, or from anyone else in our lives.  There’s no magic pill, no prince or princess who can make it happen.  It’s on each of us to find within ourselves.

Trying our best to live the verses cited above, to me, seems a perfect place to start in finding peace, no matter what our external situations may be.  Again, yoga stuff blows my mind!

Have a great weekend.  Namaste 🙂

Week in Review

Highlights and lowlights from my week:

First, the lowlights:

* It snowed. About five inches in the Trenton, New Jersey area. This meant that I had to dig out snow pants, waterproof gloves, hats, scarves, boots (which I did not have for my older son, so had to improvise). This also meant I had to go outside in the cold. And when I forced everyone back in, I had to strip down the boys, who were wet and tired and hungry, and lay out all their wet clothes on the kitchen floor. Snow doesn’t really do it for me anymore, people.

* I filled out my blank world map. Or rather I attempted to. I could only find twenty countries, folks. And some of them I messed up (For example, I thought Denmark was up with those big droopy countries on top of Europe. It’s not.). Realizing how unworldly I am caused me a few minutes of depression. I kept thinking of Angelina Jolie being a world ambassador and adopting kids all over the place then wondered if she was smarter than me.  I am over it now. Instead of crying about it, I am going to learn my world.  Oh.  I was also bummed that my map of the world I inserting into my last post isn’t showing on screen.  It’s showing on the laptop, but not on the iPad or iPhone screens.  Maybe it was too big?  I dunno.  Epic blogging fail.

* Adam Levine did not come find me and join me in yoga class. In fact, I only attended one yoga class this week since my husband was sick. Two of my friends also suffered this week, both with debilitating back pain. I felt bad for all three of them and wished I could help, but there was nothing I could do.

* The Great Picture Project has gone nowhere. I am considering my sister-in-law’s offer to take over the project, even though it means transporting the ridiculous pile to North Jersey and admitting defeat.

* I wussed out, Blogtropolis. A writer blogger I follow, Angela’s World of Writing, is hosting a writing contest. 1000 words-any genre-topic, Valentine’s Day (you can join too if you want). I would post something here, then link to it on her site, and ask you all to go thumbs up it by her. I drafted a cute little story, but now I am shy about posting it. I have until V-day though, so it may still happen.

*  Finally, work stunk this week.

ONTO THE HIGHLIGHTS!!!

* It snowed and the kids were thrilled. I decided to learn about the world. I got to go to yoga class this week and stare at my magazine with Adam Levine on it. I am working on forgiving myself for not dealing with the photograph pile. At least it’s on the radar, sort of. I drafted a cute story for a writing contest. I am blogging!  And thank god I have a job which gives me a paycheck, allows me to see my co-worker friends, and provides snack machines and coffee.  Do you see the two-sides-to-every-coin point I am going for here?  The power of positivity can turn the lowlights into highlights.

Another pic of Adam. Just for fun.
You’re welcome!
(Image: images6.fanpop.com)

On to other good news:

* A writer who wrote something I love has granted me permission, via a letter in response to my inquiry, to post her work here on WOAW. That’s on next week’s agenda so keep an eye out. The letter she wrote made me feel good about myself, and people, and life in general.

* Scandal was UH-MAZING this week. Love that show! So much happened in the hour that I thought my head would explode. Great television can put me in a great mood.

Scandal on ABC
(Image: tvguide.com)

Walking Dead starts tomorrow too and I love zombies.

* Great music can also put me in a great mood. This week, I decided that this album:

photo
The Killers
“Hot Fuss”

is on my list of Top Five Favorite Albums Ever. By that I mean I love it from start to finish. Every song is friggin’ fantastic. I am so glad that instead of letting individual songs pop up on my shuffle by chance, I deliberately played the whole album from start to finish at work this week and re-appreciated it.  It also gave the work day a needed boost.  Thanks, The Killers.

I hope you are all having a great weekend!  Thanks for reading.

Adam Levine, Chicken Wings, and Yoga

On Saturday, M. and I ventured on our weekly food shopping journey to Whole Foods.  My husband requested wings for Superbowl Sunday and Whole Foods was having a sale, so M. and I did our shopping, then grabbed a bucket and filled it up with three different types of chicken wings.

M. and I were making our way to the check-out line when I noticed this staring at me:

photo-8
Men’s Health Magazine
March 2013

I love Adam Levine.  Especially smiling, happy Adam Levine in a black tee shirt. How can I walk past that picture without picking him up? Look at how he’s staring at me, Blogtropolis!

Ignoring that I had already grabbed myself some Gluten Free Double Chocolate Muffins, I decided that I would splurge and buy Adam/Men’s Health as my Superbowl Treat. I took a magazine from the back of the rack (I wanted an untouched copy) and carefully placed it in a special spot in the cart where I knew M. wouldn’t bother it and it wouldn’t get chicken wing residue or any other food substance on it. Adam was now in my cart, on the way to my home.

M. and I always pick the wrong line for the check out. It’s a talent we have. Some force beyond our control sees the two of us together, with M. losing his patience and me losing steam, and punishes us by sending us to the aisle where the register tape needs changing, the cashiers are switching shifts, or the lady in front of us needs price check after price check. At Whole Foods on Superbowl Saturday, M. and I picked the check-out with the Senior Citizen cashier who formed friendships with all of the customers.

As I unloaded the cart (tenderly placing Adam on a dry, clean plastic tub of lettuce– organic of course– it is Whole Foods), Senior Citizen Cashier “Jeff,” according to his name tag, exchanged recipes with the woman in front of me. I didn’t get upset, since I knew this was solely the result of the universe reinforcing the talents of M. and I to find “this” line. I just sighed and waited and watched the perishables start to perish as Jeff jotted down his turkey chili recipe.

Finally, Jeff turned to me and greeted me like an old friend, and started the conversation with a comment on the fish I had bought. Within the time it took for five items to be scanned, Jeff had elicited that I did not eat fish, was gluten free but not vegetarian, and bought the chicken wings for my husband as a special treat to eat during the Superbowl.  Then he got to Adam.  He scanned him and placed him up on the ledge by the credit card machine.

Jeff:  You know, people often mistake me for Adam Levine.

Me:  Yeah, I can see that.  I was going to ask you to sign it for me.

Jeff:  I have tattoos like that too.

Me:  Uh-huh.

Jeff:  Is that for your husband?

Me:  Nope.  It’s a treat for me.  Maybe I’ll let him look at it.

Jeff:  So it’s your bucket of wings.

Adam Levine was my bucket of chicken wings!  Jeff was right.

At home later, when I explained to my husband why I bought Men’s Health magazine, I told him “it was my chicken wings.”  He didn’t get it, had no idea who Adam Levine was, and pointed out that the wings were on sale. “Forget it,” I told him, puzzled that hundred-year-old Jeff knew who Adam Levine was but my husband didn’t. Husband asked me if Adam “was in a band,” then sat down and flipped through the magazine before I had the chance to check it out myself.

A few minutes later, he yelled to me from the living room:  “Hey, your boyfriend Adam Levine does yoga.”

Huh?  I had no idea.

Sure enough, the article in Men’s Health centers around Adam’s devout yoga practice.  He’s been practicing for years, has his own trainer, and even does yoga for an hour before each show.  A couple of lovely pictures of Adam in different poses grace the pages.  If you’ve read my blog, you know that yoga is becoming a part of my life too (see here and here).  Don’t Adam and I have so much in common?  I wonder if he’d be interested in a mom who wears “Not Your Daughter’s Jeans” jeans and drives a minivan? Maybe he’s sick of models, right?

Okay, perhaps he’s not quite ready for someone as mature and wonderful as me.  In the meantime, while Adam goes through his “models stage” dating the actual wearers of the “Yes these Are the Daughter’s Jeans” jeans, I’ll just admire his picture on the cover of my “bucket of wings” magazine and dedicate my yoga practice to him at my next class.  Maybe he’ll feel my positive vibes and send some back my way.

Thanks for reading!

Chopping the Branches of Avidya

My husband gave me a book for Christmas called, The Heart of Yoga: Developing a Personal Practice, by T.K.V. Desikachar. I previously posted about my newfound love for yoga, and I wanted to share something I read that applies universally, whether or not you enjoy yoga practice. The following is from Chapter Two, “The Foundations of Yoga Practice.”  Don’t be scared.  Read on, Blogtropolis!

Yoga is “the ability to direct the mind without distraction or interruption.”  One goal of yoga, explains Desikachar, is to “reduce the film of avidya in order to act correctly.”  Avidya literally means “incorrect comprehension.” We don’t see things as they really are.  Desikachar describes it as “the accumulated result of our many unconscious actions, the actions and ways of perceiving that we have been mechanically carrying out for years.  As a result of these unconscious responses, the mind becomes more and more dependent on habits until we accept the actions of yesterday as the norms of today.” With these habits of action and perception, avidya covers the mind and obscures clarity.

Bear with me. I know it’s heavy. I had to think about it for it to make sense. Go back and read it again if need be.

While avidya is difficult to perceive within ourselves, the four branches of avidya are easier to identify. In non-yoga language, the first branch is ego:  the sense that we have to be right, and better than other people. The second branch is making demands, or attachment:  we want things we do not have and what we do have is not enough. “We want to keep what we are asked to give away.” The third branch of avidya is rejection or refusal:  if we have a difficult experience we are afraid of repeating it, so we reject the people, thoughts, etc. that relate to the experience. Likewise, we reject the unfamiliar because we have no experience with it. The fourth branch of avidya is fear:  we have uncertainty and doubts, we are afraid of being judged,and we fear aging.

Desikachar explains that these branches of avidya cloud our perception. “As long as the branches of avidya are expanding there is a great chance that we will make false moves because we do not weigh things carefully and make sound judgments.”

I read this chapter and immediately related to these four branches as obstacles. How many of us are afraid to say “I’m sorry,” or “I was wrong”?  How many of us are attached to “things”- getting more things, keeping our things, the sense of security that comes from having these things? What about rejecting the unfamiliar? We don’t understand something so we reject it and devalue it. We don’t understand what it feels like to be unemployed so we say, “just get a job.” We don’t understand depression, so we say, “snap out of it.” And fear? There’s a topic that I struggle with often, especially with writing. Do you, too, let fear cloud your judgment?

So what do we do? How do we reduce avidya and acquire the opposite of avidya, or vidya, meaning “correct understanding”?

Three things are suggested:  First, keeping ourselves healthy and inwardly cleansed. In yoga we breathe to cleanse. Desikachar explains that the breathing exercises of yoga use “the same principle as heating gold in order to purify it.” Breathing releases our blocks and impurities.

Second, we get to know ourselves. Who we are, what we are, what our relationship to the world is. Desikachar says:  “It is not enough to keep ourselves healthy. We should know who we are and how we relate to other people.”

Finally, we promote the quality of our actions. “Keeping oneself healthy, and reflecting on oneself do not constitute all our actions.  We also have to pursue our career, gain qualifications, and do everything else that is part of normal life. All these things should be done as well as possible.”

Phew! Seems simple enough. Be healthy, get to know ourselves, and do stuff well. Not quite so easy in practice, though.

Even if we don’t practice yoga, when we feel these branches of avidya coming to tangle us up, breathing one deep cleansing breath can still help. In yoga and in life, sometimes your mind and body feel completely different after that big breath than they did before that breath. Keeping our bodies healthy and taking a cleansing breath once in awhile can do wonders. Hey, it can’t hurt, right?

Getting to know ourselves is tough. We run through life like a hamster on a wheel, task after task, appointment after appointment, here, there, everywhere. Then it’s bedtime. When do we make time for ourselves to reflect and think about who we really are deep in our cores? Are we satisfied with how we live our lives?  In my Happy Meter post, I wondered how much happiness would be displayed each day if we had to plug ourselves in to the meter every night for a reading. Are we the kind of person we want to be? Do we know what we want, and who we are?

Quality of actions is also challenging. I know I suffer in this area. In some parts of my life I don’t try as hard as I should. I don’t give it my “all.” I don’t take pride in what I am producing. I only want to get through the hour or the day or the week. Get to that “Me Time” and to my bed. But what we need to realize is that if we do our best, even with the stuff we don’t so much enjoy, maybe we will feel better about ourselves overall. For me, when I try my hardest I feel settled because I know that I powered through, and whether I succeeded or failed I did the best I possibly could. That’s all we can do.

I doubt anyone would suggest that working on ourselves to achieve clarity and understanding is easy. It takes a lifetime of work. Is the work worth it?  I think so, because the work itself, the journey, makes us better people. And better people make for better worlds, more loving and understanding families, and a more peaceful existence.

Thanks again for reading.

(Sources:  The Heart of Yoga: Developing a Personal Practice, by T.K.V. Desikachar, 1995; citing Patanjali’s Yoga Sutra)