Okay everyone! Just a quick post with Friends Trivia Answers!
Let’s see how you did:
What are Rachel’s sisters’ names? Jill and Amy Bonus: Who played them? Reese Witherspoon (Jill) and Christina Applegate (Amy)
What song does Monica sing when she performs karaoke at Mike’s bar? Tanya Tucker’s Delta Dawn
At which University is Ross a professor? NYU
What actor plays Monica’s boyfriend Richard? Tom Selleck
What is the name of the T.V. show that Joey stars in with a robot? Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E.
Which actress plays Phoebe’s birth mom (think Montauk)? Teri Garr
Chandler was trapped in an ATM vestibule. Who was with him? Jill Goodacre
What was Monica’s nickname when she played field hockey? “Big Fat Goalie”
What do Monica’s parents call her? “Har-Monica”
Who did Joey play on Days of our Lives and what was his fate? Dr. Drake Ramorey. He fell down an elevator shaft.
What does WENUS stand for? Weekly Estimated Net Usage System (or Statistics- it changes during the series).
What’s Joey’s favorite food? “Sandwiches”
Which zoo does Marcel get into? San Diego
What was the name of the man who lived under the girls’ apartment? Mr. Heckles
Why was Chandler put in the box? To show Joey how sorry he is for kissing Cathy, Joey’s girlfriend
Who did Ross meet when he went to China, and what did he plan on buying with that person? Ross meets Julie in China and they plan on buying a cat together.
Who played Phoebe’s brother? Giovanni Ribisi
What song does Ross sing to baby Emma to make her laugh? Baby Got Back, by Sir Mix-A-Lot
Which character has a third nipple? Chandler (he calls it a “nubbin”)
What song does Ross dedicate to Rachel on the radio? With or Without You, by U2.
I hope you enjoyed taking this trip down memory lane! How’d you do?
Have a great rest of your Sunday. Thanks for playing along 🙂
Greetings, from “the editing cave” where I’m busy revising The Love Square. Here’s a list of some things I’ve learned:
I have a lot of “staring” happening. He stared at her, she stared at him, etc. etc. I’m working on it, people.
There’s no good word for a female half-laugh– “giggle” sounds too silly and “chuckled” sounds like something an old man would do. “Stifled a laugh” works sometimes. “Scoffed” seems weird. Hopefully you can help me out with this. Anyone?
Before submitting my manuscript for publishing, I went through and took out all of my seemingly unnecessary commas. However, my editor has been adding many of the deleted commas back in. I’m never going to understand commas. Still, love, them, though, and, don’t, care.
I could spend the rest of my life editing this manuscript. In the beginning, I found myself re-starting at page one every night and finding something to change or add or subtract each time. I had to cut myself off and keep the wheels moving forward.
I like editing. It’s nice to get lost in your story and your characters in such an in-depth way. During NaNo and while writing that first draft, I tend to spit out the words just to get them on the page. With editing, the real writing tools come out and you can apply things you’ve learned. Every sentence receives your undivided attention.
So that’s where I am. Muddling through, hoping to make it better with each pass. Is it Hemingway? No. Is it the best book I’m ever going to write? Probably not. I hope to learn more and more as I progress down this path. Still, I’m confident it’s a good contemporary love story that’s worth the reader’s time.
Onto something irrelevantly relevant. Who remembers Fraggle Rock?
Ah, the Fraggles! Weren’t they the greatest? My kids have the first season on DVD. The coolest thing about the DVD set is that it comes with a replica of Jim Henson’s notebook, dated April 3, 1981, with his thoughts while developing Fraggle Rock.
This discovery (we’ve had the DVD set for years and I had no idea the replica notebook was included) made me so freaking happy. Look at some sample pics:
It’s his actual notes!
Now, look at all those scribbles. Back in ’81 before the days of Word, this was how editing was done, I guess. I love that he used a notebook like this to scribble his “concept for an international children’s television show” called: “The Woozle Show or Woozle World or The World of Woozles or Woozle-Woozle!”
In the notebook he describes his idea for Doc (“the old codger is warm and lovable but you probably wouldn’t call him bright”), Sprocket the dog (“The Dog, whose name is George, is of course a Muppet . . . the Woozles drive him crazy”), and obviously, the “Woozles” (“Woozles are pretty wacky, have a lot of energy, and when all else fails, somebody shouts “Let’s sing about it!” and they do”).
But I think the best part of the notebook is when JH describes the meaning of the show:
Our first job is to make this world a lot of fun to visit. It is a high energy raucous musical romp. It’s a lot of silliness. It’s wonderful.
However, the second thing that we’re doing with this show is saying something. The show has a direction and a point of view. This will be beneath the surface, and if anybody becomes very aware of it, we will have missed.
What the show is really about is people getting along with people, and understanding the delicate balances of the natural world . . . . We will make the point that everything affects everything else, and that there is a beauty and harmony of life to be appreciated.
I just love that– “A beauty and harmony of life to be appreciated.”
I also appreciated reading the notes in Jim Henson’s handwriting, with scribbled out words and added carets and other editing marks. For example, in the quote above when he writes “we will have missed,” originally his notes said, “we will have failed.” He crossed out the “failed” and opted for “missed.” I think that says a lot, don’t you?
As for Fraggle Rock , in my opinion, it succeeded in its mission. I enjoy watching it now as much as I did as a kid. It transcends generations for exactly the reasons that JH contemplated–on the surface it’s funny and high energy, but underneath are subtle undertones that resonate without overwhelming the viewer.
While Fraggles are lovable and silly and fun, unfortunately there’s an opposite end of that spectrum. His name is Eugene Peppermint and HE’S BACK:
He’s creepy and weird and not one bit of fun. He is the anti-Fraggle (I do think he’s happy to be free of my underwear drawer though).
Of course I forgot he was supposed to come out yesterday. I thought maybe the kids wouldn’t care. After all, last year we had a conversation about how parents move the elf with Christmas magic.
No such luck. Either the kids forgot about that conversation, didn’t understand what we were saying, or chose to ignore it in light of the miracle of the holidays. Meh. Here’s to hoping this year is Eugene’s last hurrah. In the meantime, I’ll suffer through another season of the dumbest thing ever invented. 🙂
And that’s the news from my camp here in NJ. Next up on WOAW: Answers to Friends trivia! As always, thank you for reading and enjoy the rest of your November.
After discussing Chandler’s job with a friend and procrastinating with a video of Ross screaming “piv-OT” while the crew moved a couch up the stairs, I thought I’d share some fun Friends memories with you in the form of a trivia post.
As Friends needs no introduction, I’ll jump right in. These vary in difficulty so there should be at least one you know. If not, Friends is on Netflix, so get watching!
What are Rachel’s sisters’ names? Bonus: Who played them?
What song does Monica sing when she performs karaoke at Mike’s bar?
At which University is Ross a professor?
What actor plays Monica’s boyfriend Richard?
What is the name of the T.V. show that Joey stars in with a robot?
Which actress plays Phoebe’s birth mom (Hint: think Montauk)?
Chandler was trapped in an ATM vestibule. Who was with him?
What was Monica’s nickname when she played field hockey?
What do Monica’s parents call her?
Who did Joey play on Days of our Lives and what was his fate?
What does WENUS stand for?
What’s Joey’s favorite food?
Which zoo does Marcel get into?
What was the name of the man who lived under the girls’ apartment?
Why was Chandler put in the box?
Who did Ross meet when he went to China, and what did he plan on buying with that person?
Who played Phoebe’s brother?
What song does Ross sing to baby Emma to make her laugh?
Which character has a third nipple?
What song does Ross dedicate to Rachel on the radio?
I hope you enjoyed taking this trip down television memory lane. Answers will be posted soon!
It’s that time of year again– awards season! Each year I try to see each of the Academy Awards Best Picture Nominees. Last year I managed to see six out of nine of the nominees and blogged about them. Feel free to check out last year’s posts if you are procrastinating or bored. They are in my archives. This year, the nine films nominated are: Dallas Buyers Club, American Hustle, The Wolf of Wall Street, Philomena, Captain Phillips, Gravity, Her, Nebraska, and 12 Years a Slave. I have about a month to see them. I picked Dallas Buyers Club to watch first, since I was going solo and DBC was one of the few films nominated which did not interest my husband.
Before I focus, bear with me a second . . . My son M. loves trains. He’s particularly obsessed with a series of train videos called “I Love Toy Trains.” I kind of love the videos too, I must admit. Each video starts with an adorable kid named “Jeff” (who is probably 30 by now) saying: “As always, we open with a song.” I wish Jeff could narrate the beginning of each of my posts saying: “As always, we open with something irrelevantly relevant.”
That being the first, here is this post’s second irrelevantly relevant factoid: On the way to the movie theater, I’m listening to the radio in the minivan and Falco’s Rock Me Amadeus comes on. I know what you are thinking. Something along the lines of Oh my God I haven’t heard that song in DECADES. Or That’s SUCH a GREAT TUNE. Am I right? Well, maybe not. But that’s what I was thinking.
For those of you who aren’t familiar, Rock Me Amadeus exemplifies 80’s music, in my mind at least. Here are the scintillating lyrics: “Amadeus Amadeus. A-ma-de-us. Amadeus Amadeus. A-ma-de-us. Amadeus Amadeus. A-ma-de-us Amadeus. Uh uh uh rock me Amadeus.” Pure genius. I know. Anyhow, during the radio version that I heard on the way to the theater (apparently there are many versions), the singer (presumably “Falco”) narrates a short biography of Amadeus Mozart’s life, ending with a line similar to this: “And in 1985, Austrian rock group Falco records Rock Me Amadeus.” Since I’m driving I can’t immediately download on iTunes, so I rock out thankful that I lived through the 80’s and mustering memories from 1985 (I started high school in 1985).
Well, lo and behold, I get to the theater to see Dallas Buyers Club and what’s the first shot in the film? A newspaper from . . . wait for it . . . NINETEEN EIGHTY FIVE. Kid you not! Is that a sign or what? I immediately opened iTunes and downloaded Falco to please the Universe.
Thanks for playing along– now to the movie.
DBC follows the path of Ron Woodroof (Matthew McConaughey), a sort of prick-ish rodeo dude in Texas who contracts HIV and AIDS in 1985, when the disease is still new to America and in particular, heterosexuals. After illegally obtaining AZT, the drug being tested at the time, Ron learns that there are other options to treatment, like vitamins and proteins and stuff, which he obtains from Mexico since they weren’t FDA approved. He starts the Dallas Buyers Club, charging AIDS patients $400 per month to obtain the unapproved drugs. It’s made apparent in the movie that these “Buyers Clubs” were popping up around the country. Ron, previously a homophobe, also becomes friends with Rayon (Jared Leto), a transgender woman during the film and develops a platonic relationship with a doctor (Jennifer Garner).
My three word review: McConaughey. Is. AMAZING.
Other than that . . . Meh.
In my opinion, Dallas Buyers Club (Hey, punctuation people! Shouldn’t there be an apostrophe after “Buyers?” Like “Dallas Buyers’ Club”? Maybe not. Just a thought . . .) portrayed the emergence of the AIDS epidemic in a powerful but understated manner, expressing the panic and fear of both those who contracted the disease and the general public unfamiliar with the disease. I appreciate the 80’s feel of the movie, which reminded me of the portrayal of the 70’s in Argo. Watching DBC, I felt I was transported back to 1985 (although Falco was not playing in the Texas bars).
I just thought it was long. And kind of boring. I’m sorry.
But Matthew McConaughey was super. Seriously. I actually couldn’t believe that I was watching Matt. Matt, who I loved in The Wedding Planner with J.Lo and thought it was a stretch for him to play a doctor. Matt, who shook his admirable 40-year old buns of steel in Magic Mike. Would you ever believe that he could play a dying man and be nominated for an Oscar for it? He’s barely recognizable, especially if the last movie you saw him in was Magic Mike. He looks emaciated. Drawn. Weak. He looks like an AIDS patient in the 80’s. McConaughey won the Golden Globe for Best Actor. I wouldn’t be surprised if he took the Oscar too.
Jared Leto, up for Best Supporting Actor, amazed me too. Physically, he looked and sounded like a woman. His performance really turned me around, especially when he spent a couple of minutes dressed as a man and I thought he looked strange. He won the Globe in the supporting category.
I suggest that you see Dallas Buyers Club if you appreciate good acting or study the craft, or have a particular interest in the history surrounding AIDS. It’s well worth your time and money. The performances are outstanding and the accolades and nominations are well-deserved. If you’re not really into that, you should probably skip it. You aren’t going to leave the theater happy or excited or in the midst of an adrenaline rush, that’s for sure.
I’m not sure about all of you out there in Blogtropolis, but I’m missing Breaking Bad.
Yeah, The Walking Dead premiered Sunday night and it was good (not great, in my opinion), but despite TWD, Scandal and my other favorite shows premiering, as well as Knicks preseason, the NFL (including the Jets being better than the Giants so far), I can’t stop thinking about Jesse Pinkman.
If you recall, I begged AMC and the Breaking Bad writers to let Jesse live via a blog post here. I threatened to revolt against AMC, future BB writers’ projects, and I even made a call for action from you (don’t think I didn’t notice your lackluster response, tsk tsk). My employer, the federal government, shuts down and you get nothing, not one post about it from me, but Breaking Bad threatens a favorite character and I’m all over it, people! I’m not proud. Sometimes it just hurts my head to think too hard. Television is easier. I’m sorry. It’s the American way. But I digress . . .
Last we saw Jesse, Walt had just saved his life, Jesse strangled Crazy Sociopathic Todd (played by Jesse Plemons, a.k.a. Landry for you Friday Night LIghts fans), and after a love/hate/good luck nod to Walt, Jesse screamed as he drove a crappy car through a metal fence into the dark desert night, away from the meth lab where he’d been held as a slave, forced to live in a hole in the ground and to cook the pure, blue meth for the really bad guys.
Jesse’s last scene as he drove through the fence, away to . . . where??
I realize he’s a fictional character, and Aaron Paul is still around doing his thing. JESSE IS NOT REAL. Still, I asked my BB-watching friends. What do you think happened to Jesse?
I imagined this: Jesse busts through the gate, screaming. He gets pulled over for a motor vehicle stop because his car is crappy and he’s driving erratically. The police officers ask him for identification, and of course, he has none. They ask him to step out of the car and Jesse, still a physical mess and emotionally distraught (we all know how emotional he can be), loses it and assaults a police officer. Maybe he runs. Jesse ends up in jail, or worse– dead! Dead anyway! Despite surviving Mr. White, a drug addiction, and the meth cooking business! NO!
My friend Angela talked me down and tried to convince me that Jesse is in Alaska. He summoned the mystery minivan that Saul and Walt had used and made it up to the wilderness of our forty-ninth state, where he is a successful salmon fisherman. His meth days are far behind him.
I thought there were flaws in her theory. First of all, how would Jesse even get the minivan to come pick him up?
Angela said if he couldn’t get the minivan, he’d drive up there on his own.
Does he know how to fish? Where would he get a security deposit to rent someplace to live? Would he be homeless? I don’t think he’d fare well in the cold. What about Skinny Pete and Badger? Angela thinks he’d power through and that when things settled, Pete and Badger would come visit.
To prove her point when our other BB-watching friend, Anita, entered the office (of course this conversation took place at work where Procrastination is a Way of Life), Angela asked her, “What do you think happens to Jesse?”
She answered immediately: “Oh, he’s in Alaska.” Matter-of-factly. As if she’d just received a text message from him telling her he was there.
I guess if both of them think Jesse’s living large in Alaska . . ., I thought. I tried to picture Jesse, wearing flannel and one of those fur hats with ear flaps, sitting next to an ice hole with a fishing pole.
“But what about Brock?” I asked.
Little Wee Brock
Anita and Angela tried to convince me that Brock would be fine. Maybe Jesse sends for him immediately, or when he becomes a legit salmon fisherman he sends money.
“But Jesse makes bad decisions. And he’s going to be upset about killing Crazy Todd/Landry!”
“He had to kill Todd. Jesse’s stronger now and motivated to be good. He’s going to start a new life and get away from drugs and crime.”
I’m not sure I’m on board with the Jesse’s-in-Alaska theory (how would he get through Canada without a passport?), but if AMC ever produced a sequel, I’m all in. I need to know.
So my questions for you tonight are: (1) Do you think I’m nuts? and (2) What do you think happens to Jesse?
If anything bad happens to Jesse Pinkman at the end of the series I am BANNING your future writing projects and AMC for LIFE.
I MEAN IT!
Do what you want with the others, but JESSE LIVES. I want to see his hoodie-wearing body riding off into the New Mexican sunset, dammit, or I am DONE with you. Screw The Walking Dead and Mad Men. DONE.
Let’s send a message Blogtropolis! Who’s with me? We can make a difference! (They still have time to reshoot.)
Say it with me: JESSE PINKMAN LIVES!!!!
That’s all I have for now (I am on lunch hour so ranting time is limited).
A week or so ago I was over visiting jhubner73 where his post reviewing Daft Punk’s new album mentioned The Love Boat theme song. A comment thread about seventies television shows resulted (crazy comment threads like that happen all the time over there at J.Hub’s blog), and again The Love Boat was cited as “crappy 70’s television.”
I respectfully disagreed, voicing my strong objection in the comments. I said it there, and I’ll say it again here: The Love Boat was genius. Pure Genius. Aaron Spelling at his finest.
The Love Boat
For all you young’uns out there who aren’t familiar, The Love Boat was an incredibly awesome show that aired from 1977 to 1986. Although The Love Boat theme song was dissed on jhubner, ut-hum, I think it’s one of the catchiest theme songs ever written in the history of television. Yep, I said it. Consider this: How many of you out there in Blogtropolis can sing at least a portion of The Love Boat theme song? I bet many of you are thinking about it right now. . .
Love, exciting and new Come Aboard. We’re expecting you. Love, life’s sweetest reward. Let it flow, it floats back to you.
Love Boat soon will be making another run The Love Boat promises something for everyone Set a course for adventure, Your mind on a new romance.
Love won’t hurt anymore It’s an open smile on a friendly shore. Yes LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE! It’s LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE! (hey-ah!)
Love Boat soon will be making another run The Love Boat promises something for everyone Set a course for adventure, Your mind on a new romance.
Love won’t hurt anymore It’s an open smile on a friendly shore. It’s LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE! It’s LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE! It’s LOOOOOOOOOOOVE! It’s the Love Boat-ah! It’s the Love Boat-ah!
Obviously taking place on a cruise ship, the “crew” stayed the same every week, but the genius of the show (besides the catchy opening theme song) was that each episode featured new guest stars.
As for the crew, we had Captain Stubing (Gavin MacLeod) (dashing and formal), our peppy cruise director Julie (Lauren Tewes) (who I wanted to be and sometimes still do), bartender Isaac (Ted Lange) and “Yeoman Purser” Gopher (Fred Grandy) (who were always getting into snafus), the ship’s doctor “Doc” Bricker (Bernie Kopell) (I never understood how he got all the ladies), and Vicky (Jill Whelan) (the Captain’s annoying daughter). As years went on the crew changed slightly (remember “Ace” the ship’s photographer?), but for hard core fans like myself, these crew members were the heart of the show.
Onto the genius. Nothing beat watching those opening credits when the guest stars of the week were revealed: Mary Ingalls (Melissa Sue Anderson), Loni Anderson, Scott Baio, Linda Blair, David Cassidy, ahh the list goes on and on. Then there were those special guest stars who kept coming back for more adventure, my favorite being Charo (remember, “cuchi cuchi”?).
“Cuchi cuchi, Captain Stubing!”
Each episode featured our regular crew doing their thing, in addition to three stories involving the guest stars of the week. We always started at the boarding, then moved on to shenanigans by the pool, the Captain’s special dinner table, and onto “porto-vyarta” (actually Puerto Vallarta) and “okko-poco” (Acapulco) as I called them back in the day (I was a kid, remember?). The guest stars were always joining each other for “nightcaps,” which my parents told me meant that they were having drinks in the room, and kisses mostly happened on the Lido Deck. Everyone disembarked happy and changed and in love or at least sexually satisfied (it was the 70’s).
The Love Boat had it all. Romance, drama, comedy, scenery, celebrity, and sunshine, all wrapped up in a neat little one-hour episode.
I got to wondering why this show was canceled. Was it because it was too seventies and we all became serious yuppies in the mid to late eighties and lost our sense of humor and adventure? Was it because our crew got old, Aaron Spelling moved into the 90210 area code, or they just got tired of recycling love-centered storylines?
It seems to me that this show needs to be remade. Come on, Hollywood! Get on the ball.
I’ve taken the liberty of mapping out the pilot for The Love Boat 2.0:
Our Crew:
Captain George Clooney. He’s charming and handsome and debonair, and what else does he really have to do?
Our cruise director, Beyonce. This would be a great career move for B. She’ll have plenty of time to hang with the family and tour and do all the other stuff you do when you’re Beyonce, and she could make her uniform incredibly sassy and awesome.
Doc John Stamos. Now there’s a doctor I can get on board with!
Gopher: James Franco. He’s nutty enough to play the part of the goofy Purser with his sidekick . . .
Isaac: who actually I think should be a female named “Isa” and let’s recruit Sarah Silverman for that role.
Vicky: How about an Olsen twin? They could pass for Clooney’s daughters, no? They can even alternate episodes like they did on Full House, and Uncle Jesse’s right there if they need him.
Now that we have the crew cast, here’s what I would do with the first episode. Now tell me that you aren’t excited to see who my guest stars are? I know you are, which just proves my point about the show’s genius. Here we go:
Storyline 1: Britney Spears stars as a washed up pop star with an attitude on the ship to perform her latest single. She boards the ship in a diva-like fashion (snubbing Beyonce the Cruise Director) and falls instantly in love with Doc. As Brit and Doc lounge poolside and have nightcaps, Gopher accidentally unlocks Britney’s toy poodle’s crate! Gopher and Isa spend the hour trying to find the poodle before Brit realizes it’s gone. Of course, Gopher and Isa have to involve Doc in this, jeopardizing his budding relationship with Brit, but at the end it all turns out for the best. The dog is found and Brit (a changed person thanks to Doc), leaves to revitalize her career and her life, thanking Doc for a lovely time and hoping they meet again sometime. She even gives a wave to Beyonce as she disembarks, poodle in hand. Gopher and Isa wipe their brows as she leaves–disaster averted!
Storyline 2: Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt star as exes who happen to be taking the same cruise vacation! Imagine the coincidence! Jen’s also Captain George’s niece and has a special seat at his dinner table. Jen and Brad spend the first half of the cruise bickering and trying to make each other jealous, with Captain George valiantly protecting Jen from her evil ex, but then as Brit sings her single (see above) the cruise ship shifts (probably because the Captain isn’t driving the boat) and Jen and Brad actually stumble into each other’s arms! Sparks fly and they look into each other’s eyes, dance to Brit’s single, and decide they are still in love. They kiss on the Lido Deck (where Brit’s toy poodle runs by, Gopher and Isa following), have their nightcaps, and declare their love for each other. As they leave the ship, they show off Jen’s engagement ring and thank the crew for bringing them together again. The Olsen twin agrees to be a bridesmaid for their second wedding.
Storyline 3: Adam Levine stars as a lonely man– maybe a yoga instructor– unlucky in love. He won his ticket for the cruise in a sweepstakes and climbs aboard all mopey and cranky. He talks to Beyonce and tells her his troubles– he can’t find a woman who takes him seriously. Leggy, twenty-something blondes just aren’t doing it for him anymore. Beyonce suggests shuffleboard, but Adam just wants to hang in his room and mope. As he’s walking to his room on the Fiesta Deck, he literally runs into a 42-year old mom from New Jersey (oh wait . . . sorry . . .), I mean, Kerry Washington. Sure, she’s gorgeous, but she’s also smart. SMART! A girl! A pretty girl who is smart too! Imagine that! Kerry thinks Adam’s a tad obtuse, but meets him for drinks at the Starlite Bar (where Isa is serving but nervously searching for Brit’s dog and Brad and Jen are throwing drinks at each other) and they fall in love within minutes. They too decide to make out on the Promenade Deck and have nightcaps, and when they disembark they’re engaged and Adam is a changed man.
There you have it. I’d be happy to write the script– anything to make this happen!
(Just in case you thought I was kidding about my Adventures in Bingo in my Bonkers at Bingo post …)
A bit of Bingo Background is necessary for you to appreciate this blog post: Prior to partaking in the joy that is Bingo, Bingo patrons must pay an admission fee ($1.00) and get an admission “ticket.” They then receive a book of Bingo “cards” (cheesy paper Bingo sheets) and have the option to purchase extra cards for the various games.
The Bingo admission process involves about seven or so Bingo workers sitting at a long fold-out table. After patrons pay their admission and get their free book of cards at the first worker, they continue down the assembly line and purchase any extra game cards they may desire from the remaining workers who sit at the table behind cash bins and books of whatever sheet they are selling.
Most seniors know exactly what they want and have an entire system for purchasing tickets. For example, they may start at the first worker and pay their dollar admission with a $20 bill, thus receiving $19 in change. They will then use that $19 to systematically purchase additional Bingo sheets down the line, ranging in price from $1.00 to $4.00 per sheet, until they get to the end of the line and are down to exactly zero dollars left. It’s an art. It’s a science. It’s Bingo.
At the end of the table they have the opportunity to purchase daubers and scotch tape (to tape their cheesy paper Bingo cards to the tables and torture the workers even more, who must scrape the tape off at the end of the night).
For whatever reason, Seniors being Seniors feel the need to line up a half hour before we start to sell. Maybe it has to do with seniors always wanting to be early for stuff? Personally, I’d wait until there was no line and then walk right to the table to buy my stuff. Especially if I was old and not used to standing. But I digress . . . Maybe it’s a generation gap thing.
Back to the Bingo Hall. Eventually the more savvy seniors figured out that instead of standing around on their arthritic joints waiting for us slugs, the better option is to drag chairs over to the line and sit comfortably while waiting.
The result? The long (empty) admission table grows a tail consisting of about fifty to one hundred plastic chairs filled with seniors waiting to purchase their Bingo wares.
This, Blogtropolis, is “The Purchase Line.”
Back to the night in question. It was the last Tuesday of the month so I dragged myself to Bingo after work. When it was time to tackle admissions, I quickly jumped on the first seat ($1.00 per person is easier to calculate than $4.00 per sheet, 5 sheets please, here’s a $50, etc. I am math-challenged). So as the first person at the long admission table, I was responsible for taking each person’s $1.00 admission fee and giving them a packet of “cards” and an admission “ticket.” After giving them their stuff, I usually say something like “good luck!” Some of them get mad, because apparently saying “good luck” is bad luck, but I feel the need to say something. Respect for elders, blah blah.
As I geared up ready to tackle the Purchase Line, imagine my surprise when the Bingo Dude (“Master in Charge”) hands me an extra pile of papers that I am required to hand out. Ugh! Old people don’t like changes in the routine (by “old people” I’m referring to myself as well as the Bingo patrons), and an extra paper would most definitely slow down the line.
I gave Bingo Dude a dirty look and checked out the extra paper. This is what it read:
BINGO REMINDERS
*Effective IMMEDIATELY, space saving in the Purchasing Line is prohibited. If an empty chair is put in the line to save a space, it will be removed.
* Any person making a physical or verbal threat to another Bingo player will be asked to leave immediately.
* Bullying, verbal disagreements and other offensive actions and words will not be tolerated.
Thank you.
WOWZERS! After some investigation (by that I mean gossiping with the other parents) I learned that there was a fight in the Purchase Line the week prior between a “regular” and an “amateur” when the “amateur” tried to save a seat in the Purchasing Line! Apparently threats of physical injury were tossed around by the”regular” (who Bingo Dude said “should have known better”). Workers had to intervene and rumor has it that the situation got messy and uncomfortably awkward. The young’uns had to yell at the elders. Drama, drama, drama.
IT’S BINGO, People! It’s SUPPOSED to be FUN!
I must admit that upon learning about the disruptive events I felt a pang of disappointment that I had missed the excitement. I also became a little nervous about working Bingo that night. There was a huge crowd (“the progressive” was “up”), and nobody would reveal to me which “regular” was involved in the scuffle. I made sure to be extra nice to everyone for my own safety!
Thankfully, the night I worked was uneventful (maybe the extra notice to behave kept them all in check). The only person complaining was the Sucker roped into selling poppers (see prior Bingo post for the background of the Problematic Poppers). After selling two rounds of poppers, she joined the rest of us hiding out in the Bingo money room and flopped down in a chair, exhausted. She then whipped out her phone and settled into her happy place, declaring she’d “rather have a root canal” then go back out into the Bingo room. I quickly put my index finger on the side of my nose and yelled, “NOT DOING POPPERS” because I sure as hell wasn’t going out there either!
The only other excitement that night was when Bingo Dude approached me with a promotion of sorts. As an experienced parent I was pressured to advance up the Bingo Hall ladder of success. Lucky for me, I am now being trained to be a Bingo Banker. I get to hang out in the Bingo hiding spot and count money, entering the establishment’s earnings on a sophisticated Excel spreadsheet. It was either Bingo Banker training, or Number Caller training. Calling numbers is the second most horrific Bingo duty, after poppers. Banking has zero exposure. Poppers and calling = full exposure.
In conclusion, I’m here to tell you that the next time you hear seniors complaining about violence and gangs and “this day and age,” feel free to tell them that violence happens in their world too, at the Bingo Hall. I wonder if they’ll soon start wearing “colors” and begin initiating the “amateurs”? I would not be surprised.
Here’s a pic of the Bingo Notice. I’m not making this stuff up, people! Have a nice night.
On Friday I attempted a lyrics trivia post and learned something about all of you. You’re just not that into it. You liked the movie trivia post. Maybe this one was too difficult? I forget how easy things are when I know the answers, haha. Or can it be that I’m the only one still interested in music from thirty years ago? Live and learn. That’s what it’s all about.
Anyway, here are the answers to the music trivia post:
1. How long has it been since you took your love away? Answer: “It’s been seven hours and fifteen days/Since you took your love away.” Remember now? Sinead O’Connor and the face video? I heard this song recently and it inspired this entire post. It has been stuck in my head ever since (actually, for about seven hours and fifteen days . . . ). Song: Nothing Compares 2 U.
2. How tall was the muscled man who you asked if he speak-a your language? Answer: 6′ 4″. “He was six foot four, and full of muscles.” Then the song goes on: “I said, ‘Do you speak-a my language?’/He just smiled a gave me a Vegemite sandwich.” Which I have to admit I thought was “a bite of my sandwich,” but according to azlyrics dot com (I’m scared to provide the link), ’tis not. Men At Work. Song: Down Under.
3. Who has a cherry ice cream smile? Answer: Rio. Duran Duran. “Cherry ice cream smile/I suppose it’s very nice.” Remember she knows she’s something special and she looks like, she’s the best? Duran Duran songs always put me in a good mood.
4. What is ALL I want to say to you? Answer: De Do Do Do, De Da Da Da. The Police. “De do do do, De da da da/Is all I want to say to you.” Dancing around to songs by The Police also puts me in a good mood.
5. Who is always Mister Right? Answer: the Boy with the Cold Hard Cash. Just ask Madonna. “Because the boy with the cold hard cash is always Mr. Right . . .” Song: Material Girl. I coveted the pink, strapless satin dress she wore in the video.
6. What do you do if you wanna make the world a better place? Answer: “If you wanna make the world a better place/Take a look at yourself and make a change.” Michael Jackson. Song: Man in the Mirror. I watched Michael in concert (the Bad tour) from about the 10th row and I must say it was incredible. He sang this song as an encore and he was all emotional and sweaty and crying and it was amazing. So glad I had that experience.
7. What’s the long history of that real tough cookie? Answer: Breaking Little Hearts. “You’re a real tough cookie with a long history/Of breaking little hearts like the one in me.” Pat Benatar. Song: Hit Me With Your Best Shot. Did you know she started her singing career as a mezzo-soprano “coloratura?” That’s a classical vocalist and I think has something to do with opera.
8. If your colors were like my dream, what colors would they be? Answer: Red, gold and green. “Lovin’ would be easy if your colors were like my dream/Red, gold and green/Red, gold and green.” Culture Club. Song: Karma Chameleon. Go ahead, sing it! It will be stuck in your head for days: “Karma, karma, karma, karma, karma cha-mel-e-on, you come and go, you come and gooooooo” (heh heh, you’re welcome).
9. You could take me to hell and back just as long as . . . what? Answer: We’re together. “Baby you can take me to hell and back just as long as we’re together/And you do.” Wham! Song: Freedom. Recently I heard this song at Pizzeria Uno and tagged it on my Shazam app (Do you all have the Shazam app? If not, you must get it.) and later decided I’d just have to buy it. Then I listened to the song about a hundred times and bought “Careless Whisper.” Then I pondered if I am a spendthrift and decided to control my Wham! purchases for awhile.
10. Where does Gina work all day? Answer: The Diner. “Gina works the diner all day/Working for her man she brings home her pay for love/For love.” Bon Jovi. Song: Livin’ on a Prayer. We all know about Gina and Tommy, yes? Tommy used to work on the docks… the union’s been on strike… he’s down on his luck…. it’s tough. So tough.
Thanks for playing along! Tomorrow I’m going to try the Daily Post Weekly Writing Challenge. It’s a good one this week. You can see it here, if you want to give it a try with me. Have a nice night.
Back in the early 1980’s roller skating was huge, in my part of the world at least. I think it started with Roller Boogie, a 1979 film starring Linda Blair (of The Exorcist).
Best.
Movie.
Ever.
Okay, maybe not “ever,” but pretty freakin’ awesome.
Roller Boogie!
Roller Boogie was the tale of Terry Barkley (Blair) and Bobby James (played by real-life competitive roller skater Jim Bray). She was a rich girl on her way to Juilliard to study classical flute, and he wanted to be an Olympic Roller Skater (I kid you not). She’s bitchy and he’s cute (albeit, a terrible actor). After shenanigans, this unlikely duo ended up having to save their beloved Venice Beach roller rink from mobsters by competing in a “Roller Boogie” contest. Of course he has to train her to roller skate because she’s god awful and guess what happens?
They hook up. Shocking I know. But in true 70’s form, they go their separate ways at the end, her to Juilliard, and him to Olympic Roller Skating training (is there a camp for that?). Pics:
Those costumes! That hair! The makeup!The Cool Kids
If you’re having a hard time imagining, think Dirty Dancing but unwatchable (unless you were an eight-year-old girl from New Jersey, because I loved this movie and wanted to alternate between being Terry Barkley and Sandy from Grease at that point ). Do you see the parallels between the two movies? Snarky Handsome Man meets Uptight Bitchy Woman. Man has skill. Woman must learn skill. Man and Woman fall in love. Man and Woman master skill and good will ensues. Man and Woman part with memories, changed people. (How many movies fit that pattern?)
Back to roller skating. After Roller Boogie, my parents bought me a pair of metal skates– the kind with no shoe attached. The skate was basically a metal frame that fit around your sneaker, with four clanky metal wheels (lined up in pairs, young’uns, not rows like you may remember). I loved to tie those skates on and skate up and down our driveway, back and forth on Blue Hill Road, attempting spins and one-legged maneuvers like Terry Barkley.
Vintage Roller Skates
Eventually, my metal frame skates were replaced with super cool sneaker skates. They were actual sneakers with rubber wheels attached.
Sneaker skates (I think this may be the actual pair I had!)
Then, Utopia. The United Skates of America came to be in Wayne, New Jersey. Heaven. Every Saturday Mom would drop us off for open skate. The roller rink. A place of fun, glory, exercise, and potential lawsuits.
Pre-teens and teens from surrounding towns that seemed like foreign countries gathered for their skating sessions. The dark rink had spinning disco lights and giant speakers, a carpeted area in the center for resting and doing “tricks,” a “penalty box” for the troublemakers, and super cute highly skilled “refs” who wore black and white striped shirts and had whistles to keep everyone in line.
Skaters circled the rink, counterclockwise, except for the dreaded clockwise “reverse skate,” which caused my cross-over turning method to feel awkward and just wrong. “Reverse skate” was not to be confused with “backwards skate,” which entailed going counterclockwise, but back first. It took me a while to master that skill. Despite my vast experience, I was never fully comfortable on the skates. I held my own and kept all bones intact, content staying on my feet and people watching. My brother, however, was a maniac, lapping around the rink like a crazy person.
The roller rink was a tweeny girl’s paradise. My friends and I loved watching the boys. The better the skater, the dreamier the crush. We all loved the refs and anyone else who could skate backwards and do spins. They had celebrity status in our minds and we obsessed like the paparazzi. Since we attended our session every week, we’d get to “know” the regulars– the crushes, the refs, the couples. If a couple we liked to stalk wasn’t skating the “couples’ skate” together (usually an Air Supply song played for the “couples’ skate”) there’d be a lot of talk as to why.
The disco lights would flash and spin to the beats of the best music of the day. A favorite was Hall and Oates “Private Eyes.” As you skated to this song, whenever you heard a clap you were supposed to jump. “Private eyes,” (jump), “they’re watching you” (jump/jump), etc. Even today when I hear that song, I think of the word “jump” during each chorus. Queen was popular too.
USA’s popularity soared in the early 80’s. I even hosted a birthday party there (it was my 11th birthday and I wore a pink shiny sweats ensemble and forced my mom to do my hair in Princess Leia buns). By that point, my parents had bought me white boot skates with red wheels. They were laced up with rainbow glitter shoelaces and sported giant red pom poms on the toes. It was a good look. I loved those skates. Still, it didn’t stop me from visiting the USA Skate Shop in the carpeted part of the building (industrial carpet so you could still skate on it) when I needed a break from the craziness of the rink. Breaks could also be had at the skate-up snack bar. Always a challenge to skate with a tray full of hot dogs and soda!
Mine looked like this, but way cooler!
At some point in the mid-80’s our USA closed. I don’t recall if I outgrew it before then, or if the closing came as a surprise. I still have a lot of nice memories from those days though. I don’t know if there’s anything like that for kids today. A place where parents can drop off the kids and know they’ll be (relatively) safe. A place where friends can hang out and socialize and eat and drink and listen to music. Even get some exercise. The closest I can come up with in today’s world is the mall. Boring!
Let’s bring the roller rink back to its popularity of the late 70’s! Maybe a Roller Boogie remake is the answer! It certainly wouldn’t hurt. Wonder if Jim Bray is still skating these days and available . . . . hmmm . . . .
Thanks for reading and have a nice night.
[Sources: Movie Poster pic: http://www.impawards.com/1979/posters/roller_boogie.jpg; Movie pics: http://s3.amazonaws.com/auteurs_production/images/film/roller-boogie/w448/roller-boogie.jpeg?1320051665 and http://blog.artdivastudios.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/1325875103-film_roller_boogie_screen_shot_cap_shirt_1970.jpeg; Vintage Roller Skates pic: http://img1.etsystatic.com/000/0/5773142/il_fullxfull.126998965.jpg; Sneaker skates pic: http://img2.etsystatic.com/000/0/5513500/il_fullxfull.154217638.jpg; Boot roller skate pic: http://crashtestmommy.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/rollerskate1.jpg]
Waiting on a Word 
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