Dear Lego,

Dear Lego,

I love you. I really do. You amaze me on a daily basis with your ingenuity. That in this day and age of high def and iPads you can keep kids’ attention with simple, plastic interlocking 3-D shapes, is astonishing. That you can create this:

The Lego Tower Bridge of London

. . . blows my mind. Really. The limits of Lego creativity know no boundaries. There’s Hogwarts, and the Death Star, and The Battle of Helms Deep. The Friggin’ Battle of Helms Deep! Wow.

I appreciate that one Lego set can keep my son busy for hours. I’m quite certain that there is an educational benefit to the kids as well. Something about spatial relations, geometry, blah blah. You would know better than I.

All you creative types over at Lego headquarters in Denmark, drinking your Carlsberg beer and eating your smorrebrod, designing and marketing these Lego sets are geniuses. PURE GENIUSES.

Therefore, I need your help, because THIS makes me want to check myself into the insane asylum:

AAAAHHHHHH!
AAAAHHHHHH!

Can you come up with something to deal with this please? Some sort of Lego Vacuum would be nice. Or a Special Lego Broom. Anything. You’re the Geniuses, so come on! Help a mom out! You sell it, we’ll buy it. Trust me. We’re spending $400 bucks on a Star Wars Super Star Destroyer, so don’t you think you could make a fortune with some sort of Lego Clean Up System?

I’ll expect something by the start of the holiday season.

Thanks for your help. Really, I love you. But I need you to fix this mess in my basement.

Sincerely,

Parent of a Kid Obsessed with Legos

Author: Jess

I like to write stuff.

31 thoughts on “Dear Lego,”

  1. Imagine if Lego came up with a design to fix the chaos of lego aftermath, it would be worth a bit. Your floor looks like my floor, only I am not aloud to touch the lego pieces, because it has all been lined up in certain way and he will know if I do. Lego across his bedroom floor and nano bug world spread across my lounge room. Good luck

    Like

    Reply

  2. Space Lego Broom
    lol
    I like it.
    when you make get the kids as emotionally involved as me and Lego with the urgent need to rescue the pieces of soul, master the Jedi quest of the force collecting every piece…it’s another priceless experience.
    It only works if you role play. You have to believe they will freeze on the Frozen planet if left out.
    For a girl, they feel left out and sad. They miss their mommy.
    Kids love the game with you.
    I love it too, once I’m in. Okay, I love Legos. : ) And kids…

    Like

    Reply

      1. I know, it’s always a challenge to teach children the responsibility of ‘order’ vs ‘disorder’, ‘clean’ vs ‘unclean’. Inevitably, we go through ‘Spring’ cleaning more than once a year and just take it one room at a time.

        Like

  5. I am glad my son is now an angst ridden early teen and that Legos have gone the way of the Dodo Bird and Thomas the Tank Engine.

    Oh how I would cringe when we visited Downtown Disney and of course he would be frothing knowing that the Lego Store was in his immediate future. If we did not leave with the Jumbo Death Star; we would leave with some miniscule character he would create that would set me back $6.00. Well worth the price for the inch and a half guy.

    Don’t fear, he will one day outgrow them and you will be left with boxes and Tupperware containers containing a billion of the prized pieces.

    Like

    Reply

    1. I have a bin full of Thomas trains too. Maybe my son will go work for Lego in Denmark. I can’t picture him giving them up ! I love the $6 mini-figures too. Geniuses, those Lego people.

      Like

      Reply

      1. They are geniuses! They somehow partner with everything that children love and create a set for it. And the video games…school items…The list goes on and on!

        Like

  8. They have a Lego removal service; her name is Bella. She’s a 6 year old Boston Terrier who likes to transfer legos from the floor, to her mouth, and then out into the yard straight away, or via her digestive system, then into the recycling…. Either way triggered my kids to pick them up and stuff them somewhere other than the floor. At first I got mad at her (those things are $$!), then I realized it was the only thing my kids responded to, so I let her have a few. They figured it out.

    Like

    Reply
  10. Pingback: The Daughter I Never Had | Waiting on a Word
  11. Pingback: WordPress Family Award | Did That Just Happen Blog

  12. I can’t believe I’m just seeing this! You need a Toydozer ! (www.toydozer.com) My son is as obsessed as yours, so I created this handy clean up tool to get the mess cleaned up quickly. But the best part is, it’s a great tool for kids to use to help get the mess cleaned up THEMSELVES!! 😉

    Like

    Reply

  13. Has anyone thought that maybe this was already done by lego, google lego vacume, first image that comes up, it was produced in the 90’s worked pretty well for messes of Legos (and othe small toys)

    Like

    Reply
  14. Pingback: “Happy My Teeth” | Waiting on a Word

Leave a comment